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What to (and not to!) Do

I suppose this is as good a time as any to lay out some ground rules, and general proper etiquette. As you know, there’s different rules for traditional vacation camping than festival-going, so I’m going to include both. Most of this is common sense, but unfortunately, there’s always that one guy who needs to be reminded on more than one occasion.

Are you a smoker like me? Then be considerate, both to the non’s as well as to Nature Herself. Don’t blow smoke in someone’s face, don’t smoke in areas you’re asked not to, and don’t flick your butt just any ol’ place. This reminds me of Eddie Murphy yelling at his party guests in the movie Trading Places: “Who be puttin’ coals out on my floor?” Do you think Nature thinks any differently? A good and easy way to remedy this is to pack a plastic soda bottle in your fanny pack or purse, with a little water in it. When you’re done with your cigarette, simply toss it in your bottle and give it a swirl. Discard the “butt juice” the next time you get into town. No fuss, no muss! ;) For you non-smokers, please don’t nag us about our health. We know it’s bad for us; we don’t need our mom following us around when we’re trying to have fun. If it bothers you, and we’re in a smoking area, then don’t stand next to us. Simple enough, right? :)

On the cleanliness tangent again, I must remind everyone not to be a Piggy Pagan. Leave the Earth better than you found it. Toss a little grass seed where you camped. Use the recycling bins CORRECTLY; if you don’t know, ask! And while it may be tempting, don’t carve or write your name on anything living and anywhere where it isn’t permitted; that’s called graffiti.

A big reason why many folks turn to Paganism, in all its guises, is for religious freedom. Respecting the beliefs of others is a big deal at festivals. If you’re a Faery Wiccan, don’t expect a lodge member of the O.T.O. to want to call on woodland creatures as Dieties. And, if you’re that Thelemite, don’t roll your eyes at the “fluffy bunny”. We all have our beliefs, and they’re all just as valid. I lean on the darker things in life, but every now and again, I too like a bright, sunny day! :)

Sexual freedom is another thing many Pagans enjoy, but with freedom of any kind comes responsibility. I am happily married and completely monogamous, whether hubby’s with me or not. Therefore, I do not appreciate advances made to me when these facts are known. However, what you wish to do with a willing partner (or two!) is totally fine by me! :)

A side note on that is the “clothing optional” festivals. I’m a surprisingly shy person when it comes to my own skin, but that doesn’t mean I have a problem with what other people want to do. For those of you who aren’t used to seeing mams displayed outside of Girls Gone Wild ads, this can at first be a little jarring, but even I get used to it after a half an hour. Please act in an adult manner, even if you really have to hold back a giggle or goofy grin. After all, in nature, you are the odd man out for feeling the need to cover up what you were born with. If you bring your kids, they need to be aware of this fact ahead of time. If you don’t think it’s appropriate for them, or if they say it would make them feel uncomfortable, then don’t bring them. Respect goes a long way, no matter who or how old you are.

Ask before you take someone’s picture (or publish one!); not everyone is open about their faith. Some people are not "out of the broom closet", which could cause them some backlash. That, and well, it's just plain rude :P

To eat meat, or not to eat meat; that is the burning question at many a festival. Me personally, I’m a vegetarian, so I can make due with just about anything presented to me; I'll pick it out, or I'll stick with the sides. The way I see it is this: if someone went through the trouble to make me a meal, and it's obviously out of love or friendship, then bless the soul who thought that much of me! I also do not drink anything soft with sugar in it (alcohol not included! Pssst! I love Mike's Hard Limes!), but if someone offered me a drink and only had Pepsi and I'm really thirsty, I'll drink the Pepsi ;)

However, I do not believe that because one group of people have dietary restrictions, either for health or conscious reasons, that I need to cater to them. Therefore, when I offer my potlucks, I offer it because I like it and I think someone else will, too. Besides, if there is absolutely nothing else offered there I find appetizing, at least I know I can eat what I brought and not go hungry! :)

The common rule at drumming circles is that the dancers always have the right of way. Drumming and dancing around huge bonfires with hundreds of people, some infused with alcohol, some even juggling the flames themselves, are big parts of the evenings at Pagan festivals. People get into a frenzy and sometimes forget where they are! The dancers quite frequently go into a semi- or full-trance state, so it’s imperative to let them have plenty of room. If you need to get up and say, walk across to the other side of the bonfire, please walk around. :)

People who get into drumming are encouraged to bring their instruments with them. When you get the feel for the rhythm of the beat, join in! Sometimes the pace is slow, sometimes it’s fast, and the beat frequently changes tempo throughout. If you fall out of time with the other drummers, brush it off, give yourself a quick breather and join in again.

Drumming, or course, does not mean you need to limit yourself to just drums! People who are good with wind instruments, such as flutes, penny whistles and recorders, are also encouraged! Be there with bells on and dance while you add to the beat! Rattles and other types of shaking instruments are perfect for adding a subtle, yet powerful, background sound to heighten everyone’s most primal emotions. The many layers of sound drawn from drumming circles can be both heard and felt from miles around, so be a part of it!

Try to remember though, that not everyone can keep up with the night owls and find themselves retiring to their woodland abodes. While I personally find background drumming and a soft orange glow to be the most incredible way to be lulled to sleep, some need nearly complete quiet and darkness. Therefore, please keep the drumming to the drumming circle after midnight (or whenever posted) for the light sleepers. In retrospect, the light sleepers should have their camp site as far away from the designated drumming circle as possible.

Loud noises at night also include people who can get rather loud and boisterous when having a good time, especially while drinking. Those who invoke animal spirits need to also be conscious of this. While I personally think it’s neat to hear wolf cries back and forth between physical and astral beasts, some find it rather disheartening and would rather hear nothing but their own snoring :P This also includes using any unauthorized amplified sound, including the monstrous car sub woofers down to a little boom box. Radios are encouraged for checking in on the weather and such, and okay at most regular camp grounds, but are not permitted at many Pagan festivals.

Mornings around any campground are also usually semi-quiet, as most campers I know are up at all hours and sleep in. Why not? They're on vacation, right? Me, I'm up the minute the sun shines in my tent (or when it starts heating up!). Early-bird me keeps that in mind, and keeps the hollerin' to a lull. In other words, please don't shout "DO YOU WANT YOUR EGGS UP OR OVER EASY?" to your covenmate who's fetching water across the field. Ask him before he leaves!!!

Okay, one more bit about noise, and I'm outta here. This is directed to you frisky folks! I'm so very happy for you that you two were able to reach an incredible, simulateous climax - they're rare and should be cherished! Good for you!! :) Also, I'm sorry you over there felt your lover doesn't meet up with your expectations anymore - it sucks, I'm sure. Either way, most folks don't want to hear the moaning and bitching.

One fest I was at, the woman in the next tent over was yelling "C'MON! F**K ME, DAMNIT!" and her beaux was replying, "I DON'T FEEL LIKE IT NOW!", and this went on and on, with repeated episodes throughout the night. Ron and I, while we got a helluva laugh about it at first, both agreed it was both inappropriate and nausiating by the end of the fest. So please, no panting after 2am and keep your private issues... private! ;)

Finally, and this is really out of common sense: remember where your camp site is and what your tent looks like. Night time gets really dark out there, so I like to tag my tent ropes with neon tape or string to find my site (and the ropes as well). In the day, it adds a little flair to my site as well! If the site is well-lit or your tent is fairly isolated, then this isn't much of an issue.

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